isms

145-Minutes of Commute: Freind or Foe - Jay Z
i pack heat like an oven door

11/14/05 11:39 PM

Growing up in NYC has left me hoodwinked.

Never thought you would hear me say that, did you? Funny because I've always felt passionate about these issues, and I've dealt with them in my life, but never before have I been quite so immersed in it, those isms.

(ageism sexism racism
prejudice. )

Ok, sexism I've actually gotten my fair share of because, let's face it, I don't look like the stereotypical MIT alumna. Most strangers think I'm a starving (that is, poor, not skinny) wannabe-actress who enjoys painting because colors are pretty, and when I say I'm a scientist they laugh and finally demand proof. But I've gotten used to it; sometimes I even hope for it when left-over frat boys try to kick it to me at seedy bars; usually I can't stand it.

What really floored me recently was a corporate ism against me, which everyone else is calling racism and I still can't quite get myself to wrap my head around it.

3/25/07 Fast forward to over a year later:

It took me a year to wrap my head around it. It took application essays. I wrote and wrote but none of the essays would congeal. Finally I trashed those half-formed ideas and attacked these feelings alluded to above, that ism. I won't detail the incidence here, but I'll give you an excerpt of the essay (of my thoughts) that finally formed and set, whole.

I know racism exists, but for me that knowledge makes encountering it no less alarming. Moreover, I am struck by Rosie’s declaration [that the challenges we were facing were because we were "latina"]: since when have I been fully Latina? Yes, my father is Dominican, but my mother is Austrian and I am American. I spent my summers in my parents’ countries learning dissimilar languages and cultures. Over time, I integrated their cultures into my own. Now I emphasize my blend as distinctive – I am neither European, Latina, nor American, I am all three. So how can I be so Latina as to warrant prejudiced behaviors?
Growing up with culturally different parents, and after committing countless faux pas at family functions, I quickly internalized the importance of open-mindedness with regards to people, ideas, and ideals. Now, I believe that being fiercely curious, receptive, and analytical is the best way to make comprehensive and fair conclusions. In fact, these beliefs drew me to engineering. Furthermore, I think that doggedly working to maintain these attributes is essential to personal development as well as to a just society. Accordingly, I am distressed that there are individuals – as I encountered – who do not continually deconstruct their own knowledge and perceptions.... This unpleasant experience, this thankfully inconsequential and debatable case of –ism, awakened me to the need to act in accordance with my long-held beliefs about the importance of understanding and fairness.